Graduation Looming

Okay,

So I graduate in four weeks, and I am freaking out. I am going to grad school immediately after, which is one of the traditional routes, but I am not sure if that's the right choice for me. I just don't know if I'm a traditional person.

I am excited to expand my knowledge, but I'm also very tempted just to take a gap year and explore the world or teach abroad before I come back to school. Traveling the world tempts me because going to grad school for a year will cost me 73,000 dollars and that is more than three times what I paid for all four of my undergraduate years. I could teach English abroad and get to see the world while also earning some money. Why is this so confusing, and why am I suddenly doubting myself now? I don't want more debt, but a girl also got no money, so how I would be able to afford to send myself abroad is questionable. A girl also got no job and no idea of how to even begin to search for one.

But, I am afraid that if I take a year off and see more of the world, I won't come back, and I'll always wonder, what if? I trust my instincts, but they seem to be going in two different directions, so I have no idea what my flipping instinct is at this point. I for real am at a loss. Like should I start applying for jobs, or should I go straight to grad school? I don't know, but I'm leaning towards grad school. I also think that I have no idea what I'm doing, and there should have been a class called Get Your Life Together: A course on how to live like a real adult post graduation.

Graduating is STRESSFUL! I want my mommy :(

P.S. My toilet keeps flushing itself and it creeps me the fuck out. I'm like Carrie with no Aiden to fix it for me.